Worked the last two days.....

Hello Everyone!

I worked the past two days and am glad to be back home. The work days were steady and enjoyable. Working with good co-workers is great and it makes the day nicer for everyone.

I have not much new to say. I came home and completed this week's assignment and will make a comment or 2 tomorrow for the topic of the week in class then and slam out the paper that is due on Sunday.  I am glad I am off during this weekend. Maybe we can do something fun:)

About my paper that is due on Sunday, it is for the class that I am in, Essentials of Evidence-Based Practice. This class takes over where Intermediate Statistics leaves off. We are each having to do a 3-part paper and I am doing mine on "Pediatrics and the Role of Pet Therapy". I will be working on part 3 tomorrow and then combining the 3 parts in to one final paper. Here's hoping for a A on the paper and in the class. The doggie's picture above is Lizzy the Dog and she is a pet therapy dog with children and is so cute<3

Well, I am done with my rambling.....have a restful night...

~Lisa

Life can give you a sucker punch when you least expect it

 I had something happen while Phil was gone to his conference in Las Vegas. I was feeling well---actually doing quite well. I finished almost an entire assignment I had to do before Thursday and thought I would go and get something to eat. As I turned to lock our front door, I got the sucker punch that I wasn't expecting. There, taped to our front door, were three papers. I quickly glanced at them and felt as if I had the rug pulled clean out from under me. Phrases such as "if you don't understand this, get yourself a lawyer" and "Your house will be auctioned off to the highest bidder on August 28, 2013 at 9:00 am"........I felt like I was going to lose it.

Have you ever had your anxiety go from a 1 to 25 in about 30 seconds? That was my experience. I quickly called Phil and gave him the news and told myself that there was NO WAY IN HELL that I was going back and re-living the year 2011. NO WAY. I caught my breath and I went out and got some dinner although I didn't have much of an appetite after that.

I realize that people have so much happening in their lives. Phil and I have been struggling to keep our heads above water for the past 3+ years financially. I was literally numb inside for awhile. Nip this in the bud Lisa---you can do this. God will give you the strength. Stay strong--not in your own strength. I listened to my music and I also contacted Holly for an appointment. I needed to talk to her and just get out how I was feeling. I made it through the night--praise God.

Music just helps me stay afloat and it did that night. Thank you God for music.....I needed it so bad.

Phil sent me a text and it said: We WILL get through this.

And we WILL!

Crazy, Busy Workday!

Hi there!

So freaking glad to be home! There was DRAMA galore at work! Usually is drama when a child is held on a CPS hold. I wonder why when a parent has abused their child that SUDDENLY they become loving parent(s). This is just a thought.....and then when they have their child placed in foster care---------oh the dramatics that happen. A regular soap opera.

Plain and simple---it is all about the child and their safety.

To the parents: If you were a responsible parent and didn't abuse or neglect your child, you wouldn't be losing them now, would you? So please, for the sake (and the sanity) of those around you----save your dramatic session. No one wants to see you fall apart and behave hysterically. This isn't all about you--it is about your child--and someone will take care of your child the way you can't. If you could, it wouldn't have gotten to this point. Be glad that someone cares enough to be a foster parent. Clean up your act, get sober and drug-free. How about getting some parenting lessons--Lord knows you need some. Maybe, just maybe, you might get a second chance. I, along with everyone else here, are simply doing our job--even if you can't or refuse to recognize that fact.

But for now, CPS has the final word--so don't try and convince me or anyone here of why you are so innocent.

The only one who is innocent is your child.

Life and living as normally as I can.......

Hello Everyone!

I am doing this now because it lets people know what I am up to (I have not posted in ages) and because it is time to take care of me.. Writing is quite therapeutic and right now, I need to do this for me. As a nurse, I give and then I give more. Why? It is not just because it is part of my job. I give because I like to. Giving is an inherent part of who I am and I can't imagine doing anything else. 

Now, I feel like I am a little empty. In need. Not needy. Just that I need something. I spend time with God-but probably not as much as I should. So I am returning my first love: music.  I went back several months ago to rediscover music that I enjoyed when I was 14 or 15. Music that had started before I ever came into being. If it were not for music, I don't know where I would be.I don't play an instrument and I sing poorly except for that rare occasional time when I can hit a right note. Here it comes: I absolutely love Neil Sedaka (I say with a breathy voice). When I first heard his voice, I was hooked. I don't know how to describe his voice, but I found some information that now makes sense to me. His voice is between a tenor and alto--I said, "what is a tenor??" and it was described as "  a type of classical male singing voice whose vocal range is one of the highest of the male voice types". That makes sense because his voice can hit some really high notes. I have enjoyed over the years how he has changed and how his songwriting has evolved. In current interviews, he has spoke of "raising the bar higher" and at 74 years of age, he has not allowed himself to be content with just doing whatever. His singing is passionate, inspiring, and timely. His music has been so soothing, so therapeutic, uplifting and just helped me when I needed it most.

I have had my share of ups and downs and I am so grateful to God, to friends, to family, and for music. These are words to a song that have helped me hold things together:

Beginning to Breathe Again (Neil Sedaka, 2013)

No more tears and no more sorrow

I can take a deep breath

I'm through with heartache in my life

Now the storm has washed away

And I can see the rainbow

It feels so good to be alive

I know for sure that I'll survive

I'm on a new road and I'm cruising along the highway

I'll do it my way

I'm beginning to breathe again

I love me for myself

And it's better now I'm the true me

The light shines through me

I'm beginning to breathe again

I have been through stormy weather

Now a change is coming

Don't need no shadows anymore

I can lift my head and I can finally find the answer

It's not too late to start again

And now my heart is on the mend

I'm on a new road and I'm cruising along the highway

I'll do it my way

I'm beginning to breathe again

I love me for myself

And it's better now I'm the true me

The light shines through me

I'm beginning to breathe again

I'm picking up the pieces of my heart

Now the puzzle fits

And I can find a brand new start

It's so good to be myself

Instead of always hiding

I'm gonna shout it to the world

This is me and this is what I'm all about for certain

There'll  be no sorrow anymore

I'm finally walking out the door

I'm on a new road and I'm cruising along the highway

I'll do it my way

I'm beginning to breathe again

I love me for myself

And it's better now I'm the true me

The light shines through me

I'm beginning to breathe again

No compromising

And I'm happy to say it's my life

No pain and no strife

I'm beginning to breathe again

I'm beginning to breathe again.......

So, with this anxiety that comes and goes, I remember to breathe again....and again....and walk out whatever situation I encounter through the grace of God. His mercy and faithfulness is there for the asking. I'm ready---->let's go and "move the bar higher" and not be complacent with what I have.

I need to go to bed as I work tomorrow, but I want to say that I love you all<3

Lisa